F***ing B***ards

I HATE THEM

Should I really give up and accept the fact that I've failed that exam and hence why I did not receive an e-mail from them on Friday?

This waiting period is just SO SO PAINFUL

Also with the other job, why the f*ck can't they just tell me when the exam is going to be?

SO TIRED OF WAITING
SO TIRED OF NOT KNOWING
SO TIRED OF NOT WORKING

The sad thing is that, my hopes have shattered to dusts way too many times in the past year, so if I have a feeling like I may have not passed the test, no matter how "positive" I try to stay, failure will end up being the SAD REALITY

So tired of not knowing...... what do I do next?

I did an interview today and they said they will let me know in 1 week about whether or not I've got the job.... at the moment I am NUMB... yes, it's a job, another contract job, another just ok job... another job that I want, another job that I tell myself is ok if I don't get but at the same time I want it, I lie to myself so that I don't get disappointed if I don't get it......

Don't know what the next steps are

I want to be able to live WITHOUT worrying... but at the same time I don't want to complain too much because I have so much.... I do and I don't.....does that make sense?

GOD, GIVE ME THE STRENGTH TO WAIT PATIENTLY AND WHILE WAITING LET ME STAY POSITIVE... LET/HELP ME FIND MY PATH...... HELP ME FIND MY JOB