Conclusion

I'm not willing to deal with people that are unpredictable....... no matter how nice they are and how good I feel when I talk to them......

When not talking to them makes me feel x100 worse than the great feeling I had at the time that I did talk to them, when I put it on a balance it doesnt balance out therefore I think I'll be safe to say that I'm out!

Seriously, ever since I stopped talking to him I felt like I'd lost everything..... I felt so lost.......
And now that he's back I'm just happy that we talked because it would have been weird for me to think that I will never talk to him again
But I know that I will never initiate anything ever again. I will never be the one calling him / msging him since I would not know if he replies/responds which would as a result f*ck me up for possibly a month!